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Monday, August 06, 2007

A loss...

...of faith? Hardly. Despite my circumstances, my belief in the Divine remains steadfast.

Rather, I look back at the old question of the Divine plan for myself. As you all know, I explored the priesthood for a little bit. As I learned though, due to my physical infirmities, that was ruled out. That left marriage and a family as I did not really see myself following in the path of those worthy souls who have chosen the path of lifelong virginity.

Well, I had my surgery back in March and while thanks to my guardian angels and those saints up there who are looking out for me I survived, I am faced with the prospect that I will never eat again and will require a feeding pump eighteen hours a day from now until the day I die.

So where does that leave me? Trust in medical science to someday come up with something? A miracle? Or do I trust in the Lord and join Him on the way to Calvary?

There are other things I worry about as far as finding a job, being a husband, a father or just being single from here on out, but that's pretty much it. That's about it.

2 comments:

Jon said...

Jacob,

Please know that some of us out here who read you are thinking of you, and remembering you in their prayers.

God bless, my friend.

Bernard Brandt said...

I will remember you in my prayers also.